|Originally posted by Lytchix |
PS : choukri bosse dans le contrôle de gestion donc c'est très large finalement.
De quoi parle t on là les gars, j'ai du mal à suivre
Une note qu'un Directeur londonien a affiché dans tous les bureaux de sa boîte.
NEW EMPLOYMENT POLICY HANDBOOK
It is advised that you come to work dressed according
to your salary. If we see you wearing Prada sneakers, and carrying a Gucci
Bag, we assume you are doing well financially and therefore you do not need
a raise. If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money
better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and therefore you do not need a raise.
If you dress in-between, you are right where you need to be and
therefore you do not need a raise.
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as
proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year.
They are called Saturday & Sunday.
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing
you can do for dead friends, relatives or co-workers. Every effort should
be made to have unemployed people attend to the arrangements. In rare
cases where employee involvement is necessary, the funeral should be
scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to allow you to work
through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.
Entirely too much time is being spent in the
restroom. There is now a strict 3 minute time limit in the poo box. At the end of
three minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the
stall door will open and a picture will be taken. After your second offence,
your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the
"Chronic Offenders" category.
Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch as they need
to eat more, so that they can look healthy. Normal size people get 15
minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average figure. Fat
people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are
here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions,
comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations,
insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplations,
consternation, and input should be directed elsewhere.
Have a nice week!
Last edited by choukri on Feb-10-2004 at 16:25