|Originally posted by Miss Pie |
I stand by my initial assessment that people who "let themselves go" do it because they've been enabled by insecure partners. And I don't buy the comfortable excuse. That's all it is, an excuse. Taking care of oneself IS important. It's not so much about "looking good" the way you guys seem to have interpreted it.
|Originally posted by Halcyon+On+On |
And once they realize this, they take it and run with it all the way to fucking Sizzler. Appearances aren't everything because people do not get to choose the way they look- their nose, their brow, skin colour, hair, etc. To judge people on this alone is superficial, you're right. People DO get to choose their diet and exercise habits though, it's perhaps the only choice that most people really have- to lump this criteria with other forms of appearance is equally superficial because it undermines peoples' ability to make healthy choices for themselves which in turn make them overall more attractive. It has far more to do with health than it does mere appearance, as we are naturally attracted to other healthy people on first glance than we are to clearly unhealthy people, whether this be to due to exceedingly pallid skin, veins, skin sores, obesity, etc.
I think you're both pushing fat people and healthy people into really bizarre, undefined groups, which is most likely the problem with the discussion...
either way, Hal, metabolism, and (though i think it's bullshit personally) tendencies towards behaviours have been scientifically proven to be as seperated from an individuals choice as their facial structure.
like i said: I'm skinny as fuck, despite a diet heavy in fats, carbs etc, simply because my genetic make-up makes me skinny. similarly many fat people have the reverse problem...
I'm sure a lot of people attempt to alter their weight, and physical appearance, and spend A LOT of time on it!
when they finally find a person who doesn't care about it as much, they become free to spend the time they previously had to waste on their appearance for things of better value: i.e: Education (as lira said), socialisation, even betterment of relationship. You guys seem to be saying that continuing physical appearance should take precedence in a relationship, and in normal life, at the cost of these things. Counting every callory, and constantly gyming takes a lot of time etc....
I know youre both saying people who 'could be thin but aren't', or whatever, but the point is, when in a "comfortable" relationship, the fixation which people place on their weight can be limited, allowing for more time to be spent on bettering themselves, and their relationships, when previously they had to nit-pick about every piece of food they scarfed down, and constantly worrying only about their physical appearance etc
the security gained by being loved no matter what you look like is, in my opinon, more important than maintaining your figure.