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tranceaddict Forums > Local Scene Info / Discussion / EDM Event Listings > Canada > Canada - Montreal > Joke of the day thread?
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fullhouse
snowmen full of bullets



Registered: Mar 2008
Location: MTL . Hop la TO

how do u call someone whos constantly got a red spot between his eyebrows, most probably from an aiming device??

paki

or is it hindu?

....

Old Post Dec-28-2008 09:59  Lesotho
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Spin Laden
Nick Vachon approved



Registered: Jan 2006
Location: 1211 Ambien City Blvd, Canada, K1A 0A9
0-16

Old Post Dec-28-2008 22:32  Canada
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Spin Laden
Nick Vachon approved



Registered: Jan 2006
Location: 1211 Ambien City Blvd, Canada, K1A 0A9

quote:
Originally posted by crazydafy
alright lol noob huh? a gamer or just a guy who knows 1337?


quote:
Originally posted by Bertuzz
none of the above

Someone that knows that someone that attends a "techno" TI-ES-TO show, hoping for a kanye west song to come on, is a noob.

Last edited by Spin Laden on Jan-05-2009 at 16:15

Old Post Jan-05-2009 15:37  Canada
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ostrich
13percent.ca



Registered: Jan 2008
Location: MTL

A drunk man who smelled like beer sat down on a subway
next to a priest. The man's tie was stained, his face
was plastered with red lipstick, And a half-empty bottle
of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened
his newspaper and began reading.

After a few minutes the man turned to the priest and asked,
'Say Father, what causes arthritis?'

The priest replies, 'My Son, it's caused by loose living,
being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, contempt
for your fellow man, sleeping around with prostitutes and
lack of a bath.'

The drunk muttered in response, 'Well, I'll be damned, '
Then returned to his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man
And apologized. 'I'm very sorry. I didn't mean to come on so
strong. How long have you had arthritis?'

The drunk answered, 'I don't have it, Father.
I was just reading here that the Pope does.'


___________________
Ostrich
13 PERCENT


04.03 | Daome w/ Shed & Deadbeat
04.18 | Stereo w/ Matthew Dekay
05.01 | Salon Daomé
05.17 | Stereo w / Sven Vath
05.18 | Piknic Electronik
05.18 | Le Bleury

Old Post Jan-07-2009 18:31  Canada
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Spin Laden
Nick Vachon approved



Registered: Jan 2006
Location: 1211 Ambien City Blvd, Canada, K1A 0A9

^^^heheh




Ralph came home drunk one night, slid into
bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.

He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your
sleep, Ralph..'

Ralph was stunned.
'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for.

Send me back!'

St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and
that is as a chicken.'

Ralph was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home.. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking, and pecking the ground.
A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?'

'Not bad,' replied Ralph the hen, 'but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm gonna explode!'

'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster.
'Don 't tell me you've never laid an egg before? '

'Never,' said Ralph.

'Well, just relax and let it happen,' says the rooster. 'It's no big deal.'

Ralph did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg!

Ralph was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He
soon laid another egg -- his joy was overwhelming.

As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head,
and heard his wife yell.....

Ralph! Wake up! You drunken ass!

You're shitting the bed!

Old Post Jan-15-2009 19:55  Canada
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ostrich
13percent.ca



Registered: Jan 2008
Location: MTL

Your wife decides to go out with her friends on a girls night dancing....

You're okay with it, because you get to watch sport all night....

You hear her stumble into bed around 4am and laugh knowing she's
going to have a monster hangover....

You wake up next morning and go outside to the family Volvo, which
she used last night...

You sigh in relief because it's all in one piece....

You circle the car looking for dents and find none....

But then ... Wait a
minute....

A picture is worth a thousand words....





SCROLL DOWN!!!





















___________________
Ostrich
13 PERCENT


04.03 | Daome w/ Shed & Deadbeat
04.18 | Stereo w/ Matthew Dekay
05.01 | Salon Daomé
05.17 | Stereo w / Sven Vath
05.18 | Piknic Electronik
05.18 | Le Bleury

Old Post Jan-15-2009 22:00  Canada
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Inrush
Supreme tranceaddict



Registered: Nov 2008
Location: Kitchener

quote:
Originally posted by ostrich



ouch thats gota suck.


___________________
Inrush - Soundcloud [New podcast! house, tech, prog, electro] <-- click to head over!

Old Post Jan-15-2009 22:24  Canada
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Nekya
Senior tranceaddict



Registered: Feb 2008
Location: quebec, Canada

www.YouFail.org


___________________
Don't wish it was easier, wish you were better...

Old Post Jan-17-2009 02:04  Canada
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Spin Laden
Nick Vachon approved



Registered: Jan 2006
Location: 1211 Ambien City Blvd, Canada, K1A 0A9

I was having trouble with my computer. So I called
Richard, the 10 year old next door whose bedroom looks
like Mission Control, and asked him to come over.

I explained to Richard my trouble, Richard clicked a
couple of buttons and solved the problem.
As he was walking away, I called after him, "So,
what was wrong?

He replied, "It was an ID ten T error."

I didn't want to appear stupid, but nonetheless
inquired, "An ID Ten T error? What's that? In
case I need to fix it again."

Richard grinned. "Haven't you ever heard of an
ID ten T error before?"
No, I replied.

"Write it down," he said, "and I think
you'll figure it out."
So I wrote down: I D 1 0 T
I used to like the little shit.

Old Post Jan-21-2009 15:20  Canada
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Spin Laden
Nick Vachon approved



Registered: Jan 2006
Location: 1211 Ambien City Blvd, Canada, K1A 0A9

Judge gives 7 year old right to decide custody.
Vancouver, BC, January 30, 2009

A seven year old boy was at the center of a county courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy had a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulation requiring that family unity be maintained to the highest degree possible. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried and said that they also beat him.

After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him. After two recesses to check legal references and confer with the child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the Toronto Maple Leafs, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.

Old Post Feb-10-2009 21:50  Canada
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zeKsg
ZEK



Registered: Sep 2007
Location: Ottawa, Canada

*Chuckle*

Old Post Feb-11-2009 00:53  Russia
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Hurock
tranceaddict in training



Registered: Jan 2007
Location: St-Jean-sur-Richelieu, Canada

quote:
Originally posted by Spin Laden
Judge gives 7 year old right to decide custody.
Vancouver, BC, January 30, 2009

A seven year old boy was at the center of a county courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy had a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulation requiring that family unity be maintained to the highest degree possible. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried and said that they also beat him.

After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him. After two recesses to check legal references and confer with the child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the Toronto Maple Leafs, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.




___________________
Electro, House and Trance FTW!

Old Post Feb-11-2009 01:55  Canada
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